There seems to be an aura around this blog of 'I know what's best', that I admit I fall prey too, but it seems to really rev people up. That's why I don't bother to check my comments on this site, as I don't feel like getting into an argument, but I feel like I have something worthy of being said.

I'm simply done with getting angry, sad emails in the night from people telling me how hurt they are by other commenters. Even I cannot handle that anymore.

Hi Phil,
I visit your site on and off. I love comments, I think sometimes they are the most fun part of the any sites. I have read other blogs who turned off the comments and shortly after that I quite reading their blogs.

I am not sure what comments you are talking about so I don't know why people are so upset. And I don't see the emails that you get, but why can't you just ignore them?

Please don't turn off the comments.

Oh Philip,
I understand....I get a lot of comments and spend too much time moderating...I KNOW it would be impossible with what you have going here. I DON'T allow the stuff that happens here on my site and would feel just like you if it was too much to manage...

In any case I support your desire that people respect one another and closing comments temporarily may help. I did that once for a few days...to stop some crap that was going on...and then opened them up again....it worked.

and it's true...so many of us are wounded, one way or another...we need to try to respect that we will never see eye to eye on everything and remember that most of us are struggling with some sort of crap.

peace philip.

also, a suggestion to your readers...or perhaps not a suggestion, but something that works for me...

I can't handle the threads on this blog, but I love Philip and his site...I will leave a comment from time to time and then sometimes check back to see what's up, but frankly the rancor on this site upsets me too much in general so I DON"T read comments much of the time...

No one has to participate in comments and for me it helps me maintain my sanity to avoid them in general---especially when they do start getting ugly.

All the more reason I feel for Philip.

It's would be nice to know it's a safe place to have a conversation but if it's not we don't have to participate...and by doing so we can create a better environment for everyone...if someone gets ugly we don't have to get ugly back.

I value Philip's work way to much to care about what some of the people who respond to his work are doing and saying.

I will read regardless of how his readers behave...

I did go try to see what happened that put off a long time reader and frankly it's horrifying. Why would anyone want to hurt someone in that position? Yes, they too may be hurt, but we can all choose our actions and behaviors and we don't have to get sucked into behaving like wounded children, even if that is what we are inside...we can CHOOSE to behave differently.

This happens every so often on this site in the comment section; take one year ago, for example.

I too love the comments on this site and would hate to see them taken down. I also think some of the best raw material for the blog comes in this way. At the same time you're totally right, Phil, you can't be expected to moderate a no-holds-barred interchange among angry, hurt, passionate and opinionated people who can't hold back... and would drive yerself crazy trying. Call me old-school but I think there's something about the internet -- whether listserves, comment boards, Facebook or whatever -- that takes the brakes off a lot of people. They denounce each other in long angry manifestos that they would never issue in their "real lives."

Just an idea... could you program in something limiting the length? 200 words, 1000 characters, I dunno. Wouldn't be perfect. You can still be mean in a shorter comment, and SOME extra long ones are worth reading. But it could be a cue sometimes to people -- "hey, you're going off on a toot. Edit the thing down, and you might reconsider some of the stuff you're saying."

Dude... moderate the comments and approve or disapprove of them at your leisure. There are no rules or deadlines on when a comment has to appear, it's totally at your discretion. Maybe leave a note in the sidebar saying comments will not appear until approved by you, and that might not happen for a day or three.

egad! intolerance and threats of physical violence from the anti-psychiatry crowd? you don't say!

Philip Dawdy responds: i'm not aware of any threats of violence. if anyone notes any please inform me by email.

Hi Philip - I don't usually leave comments, but I had an idea. Is there a longtime reader/commenter that you would trust to moderate your comment section? Some of the other blogs I read that have popular, contentious comment threads use volunteer moderators and it works out great.

I have been reading this site since Oct 06. I don't always agree with the commentors, but then I don't agree with everything Philip writes either. Nor would I suspect if he reads me regularly he would agree with everything I write, or those commentors from here who visit me either.

There have been times where some of the comments have made me so mad I wanted to throw my lap top down and tear out my hair. I might go a while without commenting then, but that is my problem, not Philip's.

I appreciate FS because it brings in so many diverse people with different opinions and makes it possible for me to change my views or think of other alternatives besides mine. And by this I can grow and keep my gray cells active.

Don't close out this site Philip. We appreciate you, and love the work you do.

And dare I say- we love you.

Another idea: since part of the problem is that some comments are so long you can't read them all the way through maybe you could limit the length of comments so people have to be more succinct?

Not sure if it's an option for you but just an idea.

Peace be with you

Happy Valentines day!

love eternal
tad

with regret, i am closing this thread. also, lynette has been banned after leaving new comments today that directly attacked and openly made fun of another commenter, which i won't tolerate.