Thanks for this Phillip. Over on the comment page at 60 Minutes after the Rebecca Riley show a woman went on about how her 2 year old violently attacked her and was essentially a dangerous fiend before getting her bipolar dx and meds. A 2 year old! and she really believes this. My parents have thought I was mentally ill since I was a child complete with visits to mental health professionals like my mother's psychologist. I'm 44 now. Thank goodness there weren't drugs out then to give me the symptoms they emotionally needed me to have. Imagine a pre verbal child with akathesia.

I used to joke with my friends that my parents, naive, repressed middle aged Alabamans, were devastated when I had the nerve to be born naked and rushed me to a shrink hooping and hollering that they had an exhibitionist baby. Not so funny these days with bored, unfullfilled parents leering at their children watching for the kids to do something crazy.

Both my children got manic depression at age twenty. This was back in the eighties. I don't know my medical history to trace when the age for bipolar suddently dropped to childhood but it would be interesting to know. My theory is that it was triggered by the surge in ADHD and atypical drugs, and drug cocktails for children but I don't know this for sure.

When people worry their child is chemically imbalanced, all they have to do is find the right chemical. Pharma co. and psychiatrists are happy to provide product and services for money. There is no one making profit telling parents, parenting is the toughest job you can have and there are no lab tests for brain chemical imbalances/mental illness.

There are a number of theories as to why there is an explosion in bipolar dx in children, the one that makes most sense to me is that it is coming on harder and earlier in children with parents that have bipolar disorder.

My 17 year old son has had asthma since he was 3. He was diagnosed with ADHD at 6, and with bipolar disorder at 17. His father has all of the same illnesses.

I am getting real tired of hearing people blame the parents for these diagnoses. I have never rushed to the doctor for any reason whatsoever, in fact I have always avoided doctors at all costs. My son's behavior has never irritated me to the point that I ran to the doctor to get medication. I did nothing about obtaining medication for my son until it became painfully obvious to me how he was suffering, and had been suffering for too long because I was ambivalent about doctors.

Education, environment, heredity gone ballistic? I don't know why - but it ISN'T ME! So, damn - shut the hell up with this "blame the parents" bullshit!

Anon mom, I can't help wondering if your son would have been labelled ADHD/bipolar if your partner hadn't already been. I fear that such instances are put forward as examples of heredity (e.g. with eye colour) as opposed to merely running in the family (e.g. language).

I would never blame you, the parent, for the diagnosis. That's the psychiatrist's evil deed. But I do get very concerned when parents are so accepting. The shrink's just a guy who went to medical school. There are dumbass doctors, just like there are dumbass lawyers. And if this doctor claimed your 6 year old son has a neurological disease and needs stimulant medication to correct it, then he's a dumbass.

I thank my lucky stars that ADHD hadn't been invented yet when I was growing up.

my son's father has not been around since my son was two years old, no- the doctors did not know that dad was adhd and bipolar. and i was not "so accepting", i read everything i could my hands on for all three of these diagnoses, and i chose to NOT medicate my son for the adhd until he could no longer function in school. may i add, francesca, that these were a number of different doctors who came up with these dx's, not a single doctor. again, you are blaming it a parent who must be stupid enough to blindly "accept" a dumbass's diagnosis. bite me.

Anon Mom,

I'm sure you love your son and want to do best for him. It seems like there's just no science to back up your assertions in my view which makes it sound like I'm implying you are a bad mother but I'm not. I am implying you are a mistaken mother. Of course I don't know this. Since you responded to Francesca's comment it seems like you are willing to have a dialogue about this.

Have you been lead to believe that there is some proof that chemical imbalances your son was born with cause your son's behavior? Have you been lead to believe that there is some genetic basis for your son's behavior?

Do you believe there is some chemical imbalance and/or genetic reason for your son's behavior?

Have you ever tried to change your behavior to change your son's response to you?

Have you tried changing his school, diet, exercise?

Have you felt angry with your son because his father departed or because he reminds you of his father?

When you say a number of different doctors came up with these diagnoses, do you mean a number of doctors observed him doing things they thought met the dsm criteria for bipolar and/or adhd or some other criteria or that they relied on his self reports or your reports? Do you think having an absent father may have contributed to any purported symptoms of the illness you think your son has? Do you think it's incurable? Do you think you should always be incharge of his finances?

Hey, anon, take it easy. I didn't mean to suggest that you "blindly" accepted anything. I blame the shrink, not you, and that is exactly what I wrote.

Many respected researchers have questioned the validity of the ADHD diagnosis. I'm not a researcher, I'm merely a patients' advocate, and I agree that the label is tragically misapplied.

One of my oldest and dearest friends was a single mom and her son was acting up in school and they tried to lead her down that path. She refused to have her kid labelled and the establishment called her stupid and questioned whether she was even fit to be a mother. The kid grew up to be a great guy, musically talented, and just recently married. His story is far from unusual.

It's very difficult to question the practice of child psychiatry without putting parents on the defensive. I obviously did that here and I'm sorry. Please consider Sally's comments above.

are you serious Sally? i'm not going to get into a drawn out argument in Philip's comments. if you really want answers to your insulting questions you can go over to my blog and do some reading.

sally, you come off incredibly condescending. yet you're expressing your opinions, not THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH OF THE WORLD in a big booming biblical voice. all those ridiculously inane omniscient questions... back off, dumbass.

I feel I must add something here re: anon mom's discussion, due to reading her blog on a daily basis for months now--take some time to read it and see for yourself how her son WANTS to take his medications. He is nearly 18 and no one is forcing him to take anything. Anon mom is also teaching him patient responsibility, and is a quite informed person.

If there are any questions to be asked re: medications and a 17/18 year old, they should be directed to that young adult. It would be interesting to get his perspective on his medications and his mom's support.

Just a thought.

"Do you think you should always be in charge of his finances?"

I find that comment no matter who it is directed to-- unnecessary and pointless to this discussion. Another thing re: parents and meds/kids: yes, the parents can feel attacked in threads such as these, the same way some posters appear to be re-living some quite possible negative experiences with their own family, projecting onto well-meaning parents.

This is why these discussions never work. I know I've become defensive before, and have monitored what I say now as a result.[on other blogs as well].

Stephany, I hope I'm not projecting my negative experiences onto a well meaning parent. I may be.

It just seems like this whole thing never gets anywhere if no one ever has the guts to say to a parent, all of the science I've seen says you're wrong, all of the psychology I know of indicates you're wrong. I've read anon mom's blog. It does seem like she loves her son.

It doesn't seem like there's any data out there to contradict my statements that science doesn't support her impressions. If there are, I'd like to see them. I'm not averse to changing my mind.

Sally has made some very valid points without attacking anyone. More and more children are being diagnosed with more and more mental illnesses at younger and younger ages and are taking more and more medications. I have read anon mom entire blog. While she doesn't want to hear this, but, it does appear her son has fallen victim to psychiatry because of mom's fears, not necessarily because her son is mentally ill. Many of the things discribe on that particular blog are a typical teenager. But now, because he has been labled MI, each and every unfavorable behavior this boy exhibits is because of his label and not because of him being a teenager.
"Rob's" father, while he may not be ideal, did make it with his life and if I recall takes no medication. His son on the other hand has been taking medication since, I believe, 6 years old. Since that time he has been diagnosed with one mental illness after another, not fewer and fewer mental illnesses, which one would expect from being on medications. So what is the point of medicating these children? It surely can't be argued, at least in this case, that "Rob" has a better quality of life than his father. How mucch worse off could this boy's life be if he were not taking medication? Where has he learned how to deal with "life" without having to take a medication? Children deserve the opportunity to be children. The opportunity for medications will be their for them when they are adults. That should be their choice. We shouldn't be pumping them with medications that aren't doing a single thing for them or their "illnesses". It's just very sad that we feel we have to "fix" these children before they have the opportunity to live a life. Anon mom, this is in no way a personal attacked on you. It's an attack on the system that has allowed and is making allowances for this stupid ass practice to continue. One other note, the photo of your son is beatiful. I know you have worried about his eyes in that picture, but I see no evil, sadness, scaryness, nothing but a young beatiful boy.

Jane, I'm not seeing evil in my son's eyes - I see my son trapped behind a mental illness. Rob was not medicated at 6 years old, he was not medicated until he was in middle school and failing miserably. Then he was medicated off and on for ADHD - but none of the meds seemed to do anything. He was not given a cocktail of meds until he was psychotic, running around the neighborhood with knives in his pockets, threatening to kill others and himself. Hardly "typical" teenage behavior. He spent two weeks in a psych hospital after that. He has done much better since starting on bipolar meds. If they weren't helping him, he wouldn't be taking them. If he wasn't taking them, I would guess he'd be in the corrections system by now.

I have never accepted what a doctor told me to do... I have made my own decisions by reading extensively. It is often my own suggestions that the doctor acts on, if they agree with me.

The "list" of diagnoses is from his full psychological workup a few months ago. He's being treated now for the mood disorder only.

If you were losing your son to a mental illness, you'd be afraid too. Afraid enough, I hope, to get past your no meds, no docs bias and make some rational decisions yourself.

As for Rob's father, he has not "made" it. He is in his 50's, usually in between jobs, has 3 ex-wives and 3 children that he doesn't talk to. He self medicates with drugs and alcohol. Hardly "making" it.

And yes, Rob is a "beautiful boy" - thanks for noticing.

Whoa, I think Sally's being unduly criticized here. If this is a subject not be discussed here, I kind of wish it hadn't been brought up, in that case.

I am adamantly opposed to ADHD as a diagnosis. I think it's a crock term and leads to all kinds of hell for the kid. How many ADHDs are just mislabelled kids with learning disabilities? At the Arrowsmith school, many kids end up dropping their ADHD labels, once their underlying learning disabilities have been addressed.

The ADHD dx and the medicating of Rob has nothing to do with managing his bank account, or judging whether or not anon mom loves her son, or is "a mistaken mother". THAT is a judgement. If anyone wants to read an ADHD adult success story, look to the sidebar and read "Apesmas Lament" and ask Tim what he thinks of ADHD not being a real diagnoses.

I say this with all due respect here, as I enjoy all commenters. I think it's good to discuss topics without judgement. We all have our personal stories, that shines when we all write here.

We all have pain and suffering, and in that we can find a cohesive bond for collecting stories, that in the end help others in some way.

Pass the margarita on the rocks!

Asking about finances is relevant. Louis Wynne, an author and psychologist I very much admire, has always claimed that financial dependence is one of the key factors that goes into building a psychiatric label. “Healing the Hurting Soul” is really worth a read.

This past summer, I was in two very similar difficult situations that resolved entirely differently. The first, where I was out of funds and had no transportation, landed me on the psych ward for over a month. The second, when I had both money and wheels, had me staying overnight in a motel then coming home. Unfortunately, from my own 20 years of experience plus what I know of other people’s experiences, it really does appear that he (or she) who holds the purse strings gets to call the tune.

I’m not sure exactly how it benefits a family to designate one member “crazy” but a lot of them, including my own dear family, seem to do it. Other members of my family had various other ailments (alcoholism, eating disorders, rage, detached reality), but I won the prize with “schizoaffective ... interim diagnoses ... bipolar disorder.” My “disease” was the only one that was thrown in my face. Indeed, alcoholism, etc. were not allowed topics for discussion. I wish I had a video from back in the old days. I’m quite sure a psychiatrist would have drawn a very different conclusion. Maybe we ALL would have ended up on the psych ward.

One thing any person can to do to promote their own well-being is to have their own source of income, even if it’s only a disability pension. Another is to have the means of getting away from a toxic situation.

Everyone is going to have different experiences. If you have a child who is bipolar, you will know it. They aren't casually depressed. They aren't casually anything. I am an adult woman who was diagnosed only one year ago with rapid cycling BPD and mild schizophrenia. God, how I wish my mother would have recognized the signs. They were always there. Now medicated, I live a completely different existance. Sure, there are mothers out there who overreact when their child has extreme tantrums and the like. There will always be doctors who are over zealous and quick to diagnose. However, as an avid reader of anon mom and her neverending commitment to Rob, I would have to ask that you read his story, from the beginning...the very beginning and you will see how far this young man has come. It is a struggle for him every single day and thank God he has a nurturing and loving mother who is willing to guide him through. I never had that. I wish I did. It would have saved me 30 years or more of heartbreak.

CP.